"I've never been drunk in my life. I don't use recreational drugs. But, I am goofy." - Paula Abdul, on CBS's "Sunday Morning" show. Oh, Paula, you tricky little minx. You aren't getting off on a technicality. We all know that vicodin, xanax, and ketamine aren't actually recreational drugs. Sort of like how what comes out of your mouth isn't actually gibberish. For all intents and purposes, you have been wasted on TV many times, and most of what you say is nonsense. You say tomato, I say get help.
