"When I was having my relationship with Tiger I was like on the seventh cloud especially from a sexual perspective." - Loredana Jolie, former Playmate, prostitute, and mistress number whatever of Tiger Woods, in her new book The Real Diary: Lessons from the Good Time Girl to Champion. Like, OMG! The seventh cloud? What the **** is the seventh cloud? What the lovely Loredana lacks in literacy she makes up for in salaciousness. According to excerpts from the book, Tiger is "largely endowed and safe sex with him was definitely champion status." Good to know! Loredana also points out that her book goes beyond lurid stories of celebrity adultery. In fact, according to LJo, "My diary also reveals millions of secrets that can save millions [of] people worldwide. I have slept with some of the wealthiest and most powerful men on the planet." So for those of you in despair over suffering and injustice in the world, fear not; Loredana Jolie has come to save us all with her heroic tales of sex for money. God bless us, everyone.
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