Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Is NBC Trying To Suck?

If so, well done!

I'm still coming to terms with the end of 30 Rock, but evidently Jeff Bader, President of Programming at NBC, enjoys kicking me when I'm down. To wit, this, from Deadline.com: "NBC has ordered a comedy pilot presentation starring Jessica Simpson." Yeah, you read that correctly. Evidently the show will be "inspired" by JSimp's life, which makes sense because, you know, she is nothing if not inspiring. Says Jess, “I often find myself thinking that no one could ever make up the things that actually happen in my life — so between the real-life elements and a great team of writers, I think we’ll have people laughing!" Well, I have to give her that one -- the first part, anyway. Who knew that a marginally talented singer could parlay a multi-pronged case of idiocy into a thriving fashion and entertainment career? Indeed, that shit is stranger than fiction. But, riddle me this, NBC: what do we not already know about Jessica Simpson's life? Whom she's fucked? Check. How much she weighs? Check. That her preacher/manager father is mired in egodystonia and reaction formation? Got it. Her bra size? Indexed, thanks to dad! Undeterred by the offensive amount of Jessica info with which we have already been assaulted, a co-executive producer of the show promises that "Jessica Simpson is truly a modern day Lucy with incredible comedic chops." Yes, he just compared Jessica Simpson to Lucille Ball. Which is fair. The latter was one of the most influential female performers of her lifetime, and the former tweets about farting. You say tomato, I say fucking shoot me now.

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